When a parent needs help, it’s natural for the kids to get together and decide the best plan. If they can no longer live on their own, it can be hard to know what direction to take next. Although you may want to move your parent into senior housing, they might not agree it’s the right choice.
And sometimes siblings don’t agree on what that plan should be—which can cause major problems. It’s important to remember that decisions will impact everyone involved. So if some of your siblings are against something you want your aging parent to do, try these tips:
When you’re trying to figure out how to handle a situation with family members, it can be helpful to consider their perspectives. The best way to do this is by listening. When you’re in conflict, it’s easy for people to get emotional and make arguments that aren’t based on logic or reason.
Listening and trying to understand the other person’s point of view helps keep the conversation from becoming heated or irrational. It also allows your emotions and thoughts about the situation to settle so that they don’t dominate your response when talking with others.
Stay Focused on the Facts
As a family caregiver, staying focused on the facts and resisting getting caught up in emotions is important.
Understand that your parents are getting older and their needs will change. Talk about what you have observed about their physical and mental health. If they cannot live alone anymore, it could be difficult for them to go back home again after living in assisted living or another setting for a while. Don’t get caught up in blame or guilt; instead, focus on finding solutions that work best for everyone involved:
- Identify any financial concerns you have related to aging parents (e.g., paying for long-term care).
- Identify how much time you want or need with this parent before they move out of state (e.g., visiting as often as possible).
Have a Plan
Many things can go wrong and cause stress for the family. If you don’t have a plan, you may find yourself scrambling to make decisions at an already stressful time.
It’s important to consider all the options available when your aging parent cannot make decisions on their own. Sometimes, this will mean getting help from a conservator or guardian. If not, there are different assisted living services that your parent might be able to access, like adult day care or short-term nursing care in a rehabilitation center after hospitalization due to illness or injury.
It is also helpful for families who disagree about what kind of housing would work best for their loved one as well as how much support they need once settled into any type of senior living arrangement.
Be Sure That Everyone Understands Their Responsibilities
Before you begin the process of creating a plan, it’s important to make sure that everyone understands their role in the senior housing plan. This is especially important if your family member has multiple caregivers. Everyone must be on the same page, so there are no misunderstandings or disagreements later on when it comes time for the implementation of the senior housing plan.
We hope these strategies will help you when making decisions about your aging parent’s care. It is important to remember that everyone is different and what works for one family may not work for another. You will need to carefully consider your options and all of the consequences before making any decisions.